return my video game
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
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