i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
My brain says no but my pants say off.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
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There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
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A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
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