I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize
