Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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