:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life