I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize