Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I have feelings that need drinking.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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