Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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