Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
My vagina is very pro this idea
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
