My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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