Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
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They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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