How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
