honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
