just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize