I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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