Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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