Quick, to the slutcave!
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
