i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
