Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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