I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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