used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
