how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
