Sponge bath it is.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize