I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
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