yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
