I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
