Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
