I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
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