just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left an ass print on the piano.
I just googled if crying burns calories
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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