Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Randomize
