We should be called the Road Head Warriors
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
