ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
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