'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
