yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
