"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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