Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
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