if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
you have to choose: penises or morals?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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