East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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