I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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