Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
