He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
