all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging