Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
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