Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
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