If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
