College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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