I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
