I cockslap morals
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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