Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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