Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I take back everything I said about communal showers
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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